As a comment on exercise: I also see exercise as torture
when I'm doing it wrong.
For me, I needed(/need - this is not a solved problem) to find a way that works for me, and also take it in the tiniest of little bites.
I tried for years to get into running. Never worked. I hate running. I tried to go to the gym, but all the classes went way too hard for me and my local didn't do "just show up and lift", only classes. I tried riding a bike, but I could never find a way to do that where I wasn't dodging cars, rain, hills and heat.
Finally last year I bought a rowing machine and a heart rate monitor. I put my headphones on, listen to a podcast, and focus on keeping my heart rate in a specific zone for a certain amount of time. If it's hot, I turn on the AC. If I get sick of it, I stop. I dont have to dodge cars, so I can completely dissociate and listen to the podcast so long as the number is where I want it to be.
It's great and generally not torture, which is nice because apart from team sport it's literally the only way I've found that isn't.