My lady has had horrendous experiences with hormonal contraceptives. Based on what we know of it, if she ever expressed wanting to try it again, I'd ask she reconsiders, or that we explore other options. She would appreciate that as being thoughtful (not as me claiming to know what's better for her, better than herself.)
Maybe it's all about context, I'm not sure
+100
For everyone the circumstances and relationship dynamics are different.
And it's kind of disheartening to read a well-intentioned comment, see people assuming their own completely different context and then getting slightly aggressive about it.
What you're reading as aggression, I'm reading as a reasonable response to a perfectly plausible alternative interpretation, which is that he knows what's best for his girlfriends better than they do for themselves.
So many men have this corrupt mode of thinking that there is now an entire US state issuing bounties on women seeking control over their own bodies.
Everyone lives in a society where everyone else behaves like they know what's best for them. Men currently happen to have more power to enact their plans, but it's about power, not about gender, and all people who seek power think that they know best.
We are literally commenting on the article confirming using hormonal contraceptives increases the risk of cancer. So if your partner is using these you basically have two options: 1) ignore the issue and maybe not even mention it to her as this could be misinterpreted as influencing her decision, 2) address it out of pure concern for her future, even years ahead when you're no longer together.
I didn't force anyone, we had an adult conversation about it and all my gfs were on the same page. If any one of my gfs wanted to stay on contraceptives in the first place, then great, I would still do the exact same thing to avoid getting her pregnant in case she missed a day, etc. My wife wasn't on contraceptives in the first place so it was basically a non-conversation.
I think having an adult conversation is basic expectations for any healthy relationship. If you interpret broaching a subject as being cause for breaking up with someone... well, that's your prerogative.
Based on your schoolyard dismissiveness here, it looks like they're spot on and you don't actually care much for adult conversations. You can dismiss that all you want but when people view us negatively in situations like this, it only hurts ourselves, so it's usually our responsibility to communicate better
you're denying you have any unconscious motivation to "be controlling," as you again display in your response to GP's reasonable personal opinion.
I don't feel any particular need to defend my "Internet honor" and if anyone wants to interpret my post as some Handmaid's Tale order for women to submit to my demands, well that's their prerogative.
(Emphasis on the “because of their long term health” reasoning, because asking them to change because of exterior impacts can make sense)
Now if your partner brings the topic up to you and mentions health issues they’re experiencing then sure, it’s fine to offer your view, but that’s not how it sounds to us reading.
Also, people don't need perfect information to have good intentions that can help. My friend might point out that I should cut back on my swordfish intake because it's high in mercury. They don't know my body as well as I do, and they're not an MD, but this seems like a totally fine topic to bring up.
I did this, and I'm now vasectomized, but even without this operation, the deal was always "I think this may be harmful to you, I would suggest to stop taking it, but that's your move. If you're taking it for contraceptive reasons, we can figure out something else". But this makes for a way longer comment, when you are replying quickly to a topic to provide an opinion on a subject.
This dude's girlfriends are free to tell him to fuck off (as one did) so there's no actual control.
There's a difference between "control" and "being on the same page about big deal stuff." I don't think my wife would marry me if I was a heavy drug user for example. That's not her controlling my life, it's her having a standard for herself. If we are not on the same page we just don't get married.
Presumably this dude doesn't want to date/marry someone who takes on heavy health risk when other options are available, especially when the nature of his can impact fertility and children. That's a very reasonable stance for him to take in his own life.
Likewise, my friend asking me to stop smoking because they care about my health is different than my boss saying to stop smoking or I'm fired.
From medicines, to exercise, vaccines, going to GP, having more serious procedures, going to bed on time... contraceptives, condoms, vasectomy, pregnancy... tattoos, piercings... paying bills, mortgage, savings, joint/split accounts... partners will give inputs on everything. There is no overreach. Strange would be if they didn't worry about each other and the family future
You will always have the last say about yourself, but you will also be mad when your partner ignores something you think you're righter
Especially if you end up having children together and cannot handle disagreements on what best for their health and life in general