spinning up a subsidiary in another country (especially one with very strict labor laws, like in european countries) is not as easy as "find some guy on the internet and pay him to watch your dashboard. and then give him root so he can actually fix stuff without calling your domestic team, which would defeat the whole purpose.

also, even getting paged ONCE a month at 3am will fuck up an entire week at a time if you have a family. if it happens twice a month, that person is going to quit unless they're young and need the experience.