This is the common theme of my friends and me(age>30).
1. We get satiated with porn, as noted in this article, but also life size sex toys, friends with benefits and plenty of sex workers. None of them complained how average looking or boring I was, even though I was one
2. An inconsistance with popular stereotype, We get satisfied with emotional relationship and intimacy via blood relatives and friends. The dense networking effects eased me into their personal life before and during the pandemic. Everybody is happy with it. I just had a dinner with my thesis advisor( 6 years back when I was in University), vented my family feuds for hours at length with my close friends, burst out on how silly the office politics were while doing some woodworking with my gym buddies. At the same time, I have deep sense of camaraderie with my colleagues. No one is gay to my knowledge, nor is one socially motivated by being one in such situations. I haven't described my social circle of neighbors who lent me big stash of money in troubling times!
3. We never wanted a woman for a need. I am perfectly alright sleeping alone, waking up alone, eating alone in a big empty house, seeing PDA all day in parties or public, or travelling all alone. I just couldn't come up with a situation of my life where a void or need with a women is to be filled even in social life. Even close family events are not at all a taboo to be presented as single.
4. I knew the hints women were throwing at me, I just couldn't understand why because they could easily have what I have and more. When you want monogamy + marriage + children + family, why judge me and repudiate harshly whenever I clarify my tastes?
5. I get paid good for SV or NY and have advanced degrees myself, but the real game changer was lasting frienships formed at all points of life. The networking effects(as elaborated in 2) led plenty of women to me and me to plenty of women.
6. Is there a research supporting alone men with lonely men? Like deteriorating mental health?