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... in humans. Wake me up when it's found to work on cheese.

Haha, much better response than the usual "wake me up when it's replicated in humans" any time there is a mouse study shared.

I’d kickstart this, I want older cheese faster.

I'm no expert but why not just introduce more bacteria? It would colonize faster.

Time dilation is what you need.

Though that does have the slight side effect of ageing the rest of the world as well.

Sometimes you have to make some sacrifices for good cheese.

And if you don't happen to take some cheese with you you're likely to age all cheese in existence, which is nice.

Not take cheese??? How could you even think such a thing? You monster!

You can't have your cheese and age it too.