That is quite ugly. I’m sorry you’ve had that experience but I’m telling you: check out other servers. They’re really quite different and you’re in no way forced to engage in subcultures you’re not interested in. If you keep running into the same smell every where you go, it might not be that all of Mastodon is smelly.
It’s kind of like Reddit. There’s all kinds of slimy subreddits, but I just don’t join those and I never see their content or discourse.