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Comment by kypro | Hacker News Reader

What if you like being alone and have no interest in others?

Should that always be considered a character flaw that needs fixing? I guess that's a question I've been asking myself my whole life... I'm often told I need to change and should be social, but my personality is only seen as a problem in the eyes of others. I'm perfectly happy being antisocial.

But I guess in my case I also expect nothing of others in return so I don't ask questions like OP. If I don't care for others then I can't expect others to care about me.

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I wouldn't say it's a character flaw. If you're happy being alone then you should feel free to pursue what makes you happy. But if other people can rouse doubt in you about it, then maybe it's worth investigating further.

I love being alone and I have a rich inner life. Relationships are messy, awkward, and sometimes painful but so is life. It's in relationship with others that I get to know myself better. I see it as two sides of the same coin, and for me, when those two sides aren't balanced, I suffer for it.

And here you are interacting with someone by making that reply. Now in this particular setting, do you feel that inertia or repulsion at having made that interaction?

I guess to be clear, I have zero interest in probing into that persons life. But that doesn't mean I have no interest in their thoughts.

I do like to talk to others about tangible things where there is an objective to the conversation. It's simply the idea of socialising for the sake of being social that I don't get.

Humans are cool, I just don't care about how you're feeling today or your opinion on the weather, etc – that is unless telling me because you need my advice or opinion. Then I'm happy to talk.

Well what do you think about this then: Open a linkedin account, use high privacy settings where you don't show your photo, or use a blank color instead of a photo, and engage with people in the comment sections when it comes to discussing ideas that you are interested in

No hellos, no posting, no BS like that, but eventually you get to know people that way

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