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Comment by jjulius | Hacker News Reader

Forgive me here; I'm approaching this from a place of ignorance and curiosity, and I hope I don't overstep any personal boundaries - both for you and myself!

My wife and I had many reasons for why we ultimately chose not to co-sleep. One of those reasons was our sex life. I don't pretend to know what the "norm"/average is, but it's frequent for us, 3-4 times per week, and at the risk of TMI, it can be fairly... involved. We know a few couples who co-sleep and I've always been curious how, or hell, even if, it has impacted their sexual relationships. Clearly it works for them (and you) and that's great! I would just be interested, if you're comfortable sharing, to hear what your experience has been here.

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The average is about once per week: https://www.prevention.com/sex/relationships/a24846275/how-o...

From personal experience: after we had kids, sex became a lot more about opportunity than any particular place (our bed) and time (at night). It was that way for a while. Now, they're a little more grown up, and things are the way they were before. Everything is a phase.

Makes sense, and your point about opportunity seems obvious in hindsight. I appreciate the response. :)

A Beautiful Mistake ( https://www.amazon.com/gp/video/detail/B00KUBZGT4/ ) is a tragedy set in a Chinese village during the cultural revolution.

Of relevance here, it depicts a married couple co-sleeping with their small school-age son. They have sex while he's asleep in the bed with them.

Ha! Perfectly reasonable question. Well, we just about never have sex in our room, but luckily for us our house is large enough with plenty of other venues for intercourse. The hardest thing for both me and my wife is the fact that we can't just roll over and fall asleep afterwards. I do miss those days!

I'm not the person you are replying to, but my kids often find their way into our room before we get there. We usually just move them back to their own beds. If they come back on their own, it's usually not until much later after we've had time to ourselves. My kids go in phases, for a few weeks they will come in every night, then for seemly no reason, they won't come again for a month or so. However with 3 kids, they can't sync that schedule so we more often than not have a kid in our bed.

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