https://i.redd.it/lfqcys91rg291.png
https://i.imgur.com/2fZyLxV.jpg
(images from reddit)
It's very easy on the hands and I never have to guess where my fingers are. It's also easy to learn, and you won't lose your row-stagger proficiency. It's like learning to type on your phone. If you change the ergonomics of the situation (cramping hands in the middle (regular keyboard) versus sitting upright with hands at shoulder width (split keyboard)) your brain will interpret it as a new, separate skill.
Also, the switches can be laptop-style or regular, and they are much smoother and easier to press. It'll take a month or two to really get up to speed but maybe abandoning a learnt skill is the way forward here.
Also, the firmware for these keyboards is painless - QMK now has a GUI (VIA).
Edit:
Switching to a better keyboard layout will also help. Colemak Mod-DH is MUCH better than QWERTY, and has the most-used letters on the home row and enables rolling motions.