I’ve met those people. They act like running cross someone who’s never held a clearance in their life on Tinder is the same as being an extortion victim.

(If I wanted a sob story about how it’s hard to be a mom I’d install the Lifetime application… I’m on Tinder to smoke trees and get laid, and that should have been abundantly obvious from the copy in my profile, which I’ve since edited to be more… explicit.)