I have had this argument too many times. It is a combination of cargo-culting and a flawed understanding of basic security principles.
I use paid VPN services a lot as well as cloudflare warp. I understand and accept the risks the anti-vpn crowd keeps repeating. In the US, your local ISP and like you pointed out sites that sell and mine info about you are much higher risk of compromising your privacy or posing a security risk.
My traffic enters hostile network territory once it is delivered to my ISP router or the remote end of a VPN tunnel. Take NordVPN for example, I don't use them but it is more difficult but still possible for law enforcement or surveillance/ad companies to coerce or collude with Nord than with site owners and ISPs. TLS metadata including timestamp, SNI and other details along with my IP are known to Nord. To my ISP, they know my current location, usually social security number , birthday and whatever info their router can gather is known to them. Sites I visit without a VPN have my IP user-agent and whatever they collect with JS. A VPN removes the IP collection by sites and traffic sniffing by ISPs that can and do sell to whoever can pay them a fee.
VPN providers pause a significantly reduced risk than ISPs and they reduce risk from sites you visit. If you research a VPN provider and pick ones that have the most to lose by working against your interest, you reduce the risk even further.
Setting up a VPS and maintaining is a hard dealbreaker for me since I don't have the time and even if I did there is a shit-tom of more productive things I would rather do. But even if that is the case, which VPS provider should I trust more than a VPN provider? Digitalocean or cloud providers?
You know, few months ago I needed to setup a VPS fast, I must have tried 5+ including DO amd OVH. They needed to collect my email, some of them were picky about what card I used, others like DO wanted my phone to be valid, it was crazy! Only one weird vps provider let me but they didn't provision it after waiting a while. OVH wanted more info back and forth eventually after a few days supposedly they let me have a VPS but I no longer needed it after wasting money at so many places. Whether for anti-abuse reasons or anti-privacy VPS providers these days are hostile, they need too much info from you so how can you trust them with all your traffic?
Mullvad, PIA and Proton along with many others let you sign up with cash or giftcards and you can use a fake name/address. The only info they have TLS sni/metadata and your IP. They purposely get the least amount of identifying information from you.
I said cargo-culting because the people that oppose VPNs had some setup work for them and they think that and only that is ideal.
I see extremely talented security folk say that and similar cargo-culting on other subjects like how you shouldn't have an AV/EDR or just use only mac and Linux if you want to be secure lol.