I think the issue with dating apps is that it creates the too many choice problem. Relationships, especially starting out, are hard because you have to get over speed bumps. Things that in the rear view mirror look petty and you forget, but in the moment are much more serious.

There's also a huge difference in how the genders experience the apps, despite a lot of us pretending it is the same. I heard someone say "men are dying of thirst in a desert. Women are dying of thirst in the ocean. Men look at the women and say 'at least they have water.'" Most women get far more matches (the ocean water) but often they are low quality (salinity), whereas most men have a lack of matches all together. If you're just looking to get laid, then there is definitely a power imbalance (an amplified version of what exists offline) and women "have it easier". But that's not what most people want. They do want deep meaningful connections, and in that respect there's no difference between trying to drink sand and trying to drink sea water. But because we're dying of different things it creates fundamentally different strategies. (one e.g. men being nonselective with swipes but selective with matches vs women being highly selective with swipes[0]) We have fundamentally different experiences on the apps. I don't know a single man who's admitted to sending a dick pic, but every woman I know has received one. It's too easy to paint with a broad brush with the paint of our experiences, especially the bad ones.

But I think a major issue of why these apps don't work is that we're so wrapped up in our experiences that we don't recognize those of others (classic human problem: "Everyone thinks like me and shares the same experiences."). It causes us to paint with too wide of a brush when seeking something that is by definition intimate and personal. I think the problem with apps is that it is hard to see the other person as a person. While I don't know if I'd ever do one of these profiles, but the goal seems straight forward: to be seen as a human and an individual. You're not just another box of cereal on the grocery store shelf, but an individual human being. I don't think this is backwards and I think it makes sense why people see this as an alternative. They've felt dehumanized by those apps (men and women in different ways) and want to be seen as a living person.

edit: [0], another example is men wanting to meet in person quickly to make the match real vs women often wanting to me more cautious. There are different selective pressures for these things and different societal norms. But it is silly to not attempt to understand the experiences of someone we want to intimately bond with.