Cuteness aside, the out of the box experience with a mac is really good. Everything is polished and there are no nag screens when you first boot up. The first experience with a new Apple device seems carefully engineered to make the owner feel almost emotionally attached to it.

Contrast this to a lot of Windows laptops where your first boot requires running the gauntlet of nagware & cruft. The device itself might be just as capable (or more), but you've already either confused or annoyed the new user and reduced the likelihood of that immediate emotional attachment.

I know there are real business reasons why the cruft gets included, but I would argue that there are far more compelling reasons to leave it out.

Yea I've heard that the Microsoft stores sell everything crapware-free, but this doesnt help me as Microsoft stores are a US only thing

Care to be a little less vague?