I'm a little unclear about how "*One day someone came to visit and used the word “gay” as a pejorative, as was common in the early 2000s" is unclear?
perjorative: (n) a word expressing contempt or disapproval.
perjorative: (n) a word expressing contempt or disapproval.
I also considered that other commenters might not think using "gay" as a perjorative was a big deal, but HN rules encourage the assumption of good intent.