Ha! This video is what I needed right now for a few reasons. Thanks. Yes, I am on the spectrum, and so is my brother, and so is my father. I wasn't diagnosed until my late 30s, but 1) I had plenty of other things to blame, and 2) I more or less 'knew' since my teens, but autism was not widely discussed then, and I didn't identify with that label at all. Internally I simply identified as a space alien from another planet sent here to observe humans. It helped me explain to myself my need to study people very carefully to form a theory of their words and actions. I just studied people silently for years, never saying much. After high school I found some friends who appreciated me enough to bring me into situations where I could imitate them and slowly begin to practice masking.

My father was not very involved because my mother didn't want him to be. To this day she is enraged that she was suckered into marrying a defective person because she felt sorry for him. She booted me out the house at 18. I was quasi-homeless for the next few years, sleeping in my car, at friends', sometimes at my grandparents'. Nothing permanent. I'm going to cut this story short because it doesn't really go anywhere. 2006-2012 were pretty good for me, and by conventional measures too.

I've been entangled with the mental health system too many times to list. It's a fraught fucking thing. A real mind-fuck. We didn't have the word 'gaslighting' in those days.

I've had very little interaction in life with people I relate to, other than my brother. That's why this video is ... relieving, or something like that.