Not a book Ben, but if you haven't already heard Jon Ronsons's audio "origin stories of the culture wars" in a BBC series Things Fell Apart [1], I'd heartily recommend it. He says basically what you're saying, and traces the lineage of exasperating _bad_ ideas that won't just gracefully die (which is a theme in lots of his writing).

[1] https://www.bbc.com/mediacentre/2021/radio-4-jon-ronson-thin...