"I disrespect him because he started disrespecting me."

That is very immature.

"Why assume the non-tech founder is always the bad guy?"

Because in most cases this is true. And when you write a post titled "My programmer is a dick..." what do you think people are going to assume?

You demonstrate a lack of maturity and understanding of how to successfully engage with others. You came here asking for advice, don't be so defensive.