This all feels either out of date, or just incorrect.

You can use consumer cards for this. Both Nvidia and AMD consumer cards. Nvidia drivers work fine now, and don't require any workarounds (they previously "blocked" VM's with their driver, but was trivial to workaround). AMD have a few hardware quirks, but that can typically be worked around too. Though you're best going with Nvidia as it's more straightforward.

It also seems that a lot of virtualisation software supports it (libvirt/qemu, vmware esxi, proxmox, xen, probably a few others). It's typically also, set and forget. Once it's configured, you're good to go. There's not much of "keeping it working properly in the long haul". I've had my setup for about 4 years or so now. Even through software and hardware changes.