You don't get to make a forced change to Bitcoin's code unilaterally, the rest of the network has to accept the change.
Node: “No”
Sam: *ICBM rolls out*
(I’m not saying they would, I’m saying they could).
I'm not a lawyer, but I'm skeptical that a judge's ruling could force Congress or the President to deploy intercontinental ballistic missiles. I don't think that's ever happened, and (as you say) this won't be the time it does.
I mean, Uncle Sam isn’t an actual person either.