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Comment by jokethrowaway | Hacker News Reader

I make the worst joke and I hope you wouldn't consider me a domestic abuser.

Given how our judicial system works, if I had an public known history for jokes about rape, it would be even easier to mount a case of domestic abuse on me.

If a divorce will grant me unique custody of my children or money and get rid of my ex, I would be ready to lie my way out.

Unless there is proof, these are just allegations. And if I were to lose my children due to the court system being biased, I'd be pretty devastated as well.

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Every one of my ex-wives is a crazy bitch.

Every judge has it out for me.

It's not my fault my kids don't like me; their mom keeps poisoning them against me with lies and my visitation schedule makes it impossible for me to be in their lives.

No one ever believes me, they all just want to think I'm the bad guy.

You don't need to construct hypotheticals here because we're talking about a specific person. He pretty much sounded like what I just wrote. How many years can you listen to someone give the same excuses over and over - it's never their fault, it's because X, Y or Z - before you figure out that they're not the unluckiest person in the world but just an asshole?

Sometimes participants in a discussion can't get a particular scenario out of their head to the point they literally can't accept even a hypothetical scenario that differs.

You seem stuck on the scenario where, by construction, an actually guilty person is accused, and then claims the allegations are false.

But you haven't really engaged, it seems to me, with another scenario where, by construction, an actually innocent person is falsely accused, and then claims the allegations are false. Is your position that this just never happens, and never could happen? Or it happens so infrequently it can be ignored?

My dad says all of those things, but he never abused anyone. My mother told people a lot of lies about him, said he abused us etc. He was just naive, socially unaware and had money, and that somehow attracts horrible women like a lantern attracts flies.

Now I wouldn't say that my dad was a good dad, but he wasn't an abuser.

> It's not my fault my kids don't like me; their mom keeps poisoning them against me with lies and my visitation schedule makes it impossible for me to be in their lives.

I wouldn't doubt that. This is called parental alienation and it happens extremely often if my lawyer friends are to be believed.

That’s been a feature of nearly every divorce I’ve been personally adjacent to.

Happened in my extended family as well. The woman and her mother took the kid away and I never saw them again. I was told it took court officials and police for the father to be able to see his son.

At work, a female colleague described similar situation. A family member had a child with her husband, divorced him and took the child to the United States so they'd be out of his reach. Apparently it's easier to illegally enter the country if you have a child with you. Now she sends my colleague and her family threatening messages using fake instagram accounts, taunting them with the fact they will never be able to "ruin her life" now that she's in the USA. She's supposed to be arrested for kidnapping and lose custody of the child if she ever steps foot in my country again.

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