I was turned down recently after a well-executed technical interview because the company was concerned that I might be a jerk, which is actually great feedback. They based this on a "vim-mode sucks" comment I left in the notes section of online editor they were using to conduct the technical round when it froze up. Whoops.
I’ve definitely been a jerk sometimes in the past, and it’s something I work on frequently with a psychiatrist. I’ve also worked for some very successful narcissists in the past, so I don’t have a lot of great examples to reference. And my socialization skills sometimes come off as stilted since one of my parents is on the spectrum. Emotionally it can be hard to tamp down on frustration, but I’ve gotten a lot better since I started seeing a psych a few years ago.
I really hope people can get back to treating each other like human beings rather than labels.