>force rebooted over my explict objection, then spent 30 minutes installing updates
>showed me ads from the notification tray
>showed me ads on the start menu
>showed me ads on the lock screen
>showed me ads in the file manager
These can be disabled.
>installed MS teams
Not sure about this? I had to install MS Teams for an interview a few months ago and tbh it was a bit of a pita.
>sent mountains of telemetry back to base (which can't be disabled)
It can be disabled. https://answers.microsoft.com/en-us/windows/forum/all/perman...