Perhaps I could have worded my answer differently. No one here is judging you. You asked for help, we’re trying to order it.

What I mean to say is that when we’re struggling, or limited by our situation we can become myopic, and we don’t see our whole situation for what it is. We start looking for solutions to the symptoms we’re experiencing rather than that problem itself.

If you’ve been looking for the solution for years, maybe you’re looking at the wrong problem.