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Comment by AutumnCurtain | Hacker News Reader

Interesting that his most common feedback is to use simpler language and write shorter pieces; personally I've felt he does very well at using accessible language but is handcuffed by the intrinsic inaccessibility of the topic to people without knowledge in the cybersecurity/privacy domain. This article, I think, is a good illustration of his abilities there.

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I wonder if that feedback was about technical knowledge, or just the style he writes in. I would 100% characterize his style as “someone who thinks he’s smart”. I don’t mean that to be totally offensive, only a little bit.

> One of the interesting things for me about this shared space of ours is to be able to see what it is that you most enjoy

This is pretty clearly a backwards way of writing a normal American English sentence.

This is a very common problem. He could just use an editor/trusted friend who has experience writing for pop audiences.

Here's an example of purple prose that has nothing to do with the complexity of cybersecurity, from his first post on Substack (https://edwardsnowden.substack.com/p/lifting-the-mask):

> Though my relationship to time fluctuates, the gravamen of my disclosures remains constant. In the past eight years, the depredations of surveillance have merely become more entrenched, with the capabilities that used to be the province of governments now in the hands of private companies, too, which employ them to track and tether us and attenuate our freedoms.

I don't know, this is exactly how I would talk if I wanted to poison the data of anyone trying to run word-use analysis against my public posts. On anonymous channels I'd probably type like an 8-year-old.

I'm not blaming him, but he could use simpler words.

> ... to witness indicia of that ...

> ... the ultima ratio regum of a state that has exhausted ...

> ... which is the raison d’etre of the insecurity industry ...

That's fair, especially since in my opinion the first two examples are definitely unnecessarily flowery language for the topic.

His gratuitous use of "25 cent words" is the most singular annoying and off-putting aspect of Snowden. It's extreme with him, which to me indicates a hugely inflated ego -- many more would listen to him if he would not try to sound so damn professorial.

Fascinating—part of the reason I thoroughly enjoy reading him is the language he employs.

It may just be an attempt to use precise language in an (unsuccessful) attempt to not be misunderstood.

I’ve primarily listened to him interviewed and while he uses big words there, it doesn’t seem as much as in his writing. And he seems to me, in these interviews, as surprisingly normal considering everything.

It's difficult to find good resources to learn how to do this.

Strunk and White sounds "old" to many modern ears.

Williams': "Style" is hands-down the best modern guide. https://sites.duke.edu/niou/files/2014/07/WilliamsJosephM199...

Here's where the dearth of editors on the internet is felt.

There's nothing wrong with an individual style to writing and speech, but editors can help push authors towards a more uniform standard.

As long as someone is coherent and concise, I don't care how they write / talk. Also if they cut out superfluous language and try not to use esoteric phrases & words, that's a bonus.

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