Comment by fastball | Hacker News Reader

Comment by fastball | Hacker News Reader

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I think the part you're missing is that this is supposed to be followed up by actual conversations and interactions.

There are a great many friends where Life Happens™ and although I genuinely care about them, I haven't contacted them in months / years (and vice versa) because I'm not generally the type to initiate small-talk. That doesn't mean I don't enjoy catching up with friends and going over the little things in our lives, it's just not something I naturally do. Having an app that helps you keep in touch with the people you care about (if you don't care why would you bother to set up an app) seems helpful.

And I think stating that this is not introversion but more like psychopathy is a bit beyond the pale. It can be hard for introverts to kickstart conversations with people they haven't talked to in a while for various reasons, none of which are "because they're a sociopath". They might feel like they're intruding or they might have confidence issues which cause them to feel that messaging people out of the blue will make them seem weird, even if neither of those things are actually true from the other person's perspective.

I agree. Most people are happy when I reach out to them, but I have what feels like an irrational feeling that people don't want me to reach out. I don't particularly care about the pre-made messages in the app, but making reaching out to people an obligation by using reminders means I make time for friends.

It may not be because they are being a sociopath but it also isn't just because of being an introvert. What you are describing is social anxiety which some introverts have and others do not.

Nobody said all introverts ("can be hard"). I think you'd classify anyone with social anxiety as an introvert. Therefore this is a problem that introverts have.

That's incorrect. Extroverts can also be shy and be affected by social anxiety. Having those conflicting traits together is often more frustrating than for introverts.

Words have meanings, and that's not what introvert means.

> Introvert: a shy, reticent person.

What person with social anxiety does that not apply to?

No idea why the two of you are quibbling over the use of the word introvert here.

People with social anxiety often come accross as introverted, because they are anxious about interacting - however that doesn't mean they don't want to interact, the desire might be extremely strong, exacerbated be the perceived difficulty in doing so. Compare an introvert who is not socially anxious, who simple has a lower desire to interact. Likewise, some socially anxious people cope by being more extroverted, louder, more interactive. So.. there is a difference in the internal experience, and the external presentation.. and i think when we're talking about a person, rather than their current actions, we normally mean the former but are mislead by the latter.

Introverts don't even necessarily have a lower desire to interact. Many introverts very much desire to interact and do frequently interact with others. They just do so in a different manner than extroverts. Usually more one on one and often for a shorter duration than extroverts.

The popular and psychological definition are quite different from one another.

To go even further, there are multiple definitions to the word in psychology, depending on what sources you rely upon (ie Jung’s, the "Big Five"’s, and probably others)

So, yes, there is a lot of room for miscommunication

This app won't last long enough to remind you to message year old dormant relationships, so if that's important one should find something else.

I also don't see how an automated message helps you keep in touch though. It seems like people with a lot of this anxiety will just fiddle with the settings exactly like they fiddle typing out drafts they never send.

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