Also, you work at a FAANG, for any reasonable definition of success, you've made it. You wouldn't be where you are if you weren't good at what you do and vetted by lots of people. Can you get better? Have you done mistakes? Probably, but that doesn't mean you're bad.
Somebody here need to hear this:
You really REALLY need an identity outside of work. Having "made it" because you work at company X, your boss likes you, you got an award - these things are VERY empty and will contribute to depression.
Consider augmenting your life with some of the following: relationships (perhaps with God), hobbies, volunteer work, exercise
For many people, it's the target for their professional career to get hired by FAANG (though it seems HN strongly dislikes that view).
Is it? I've never heard that about Amazon, for instance. At Google or Facebook or whatever sure but the fact that they're using the acronym and not the company implies Amazon to me.
If your company finds out that you hate it and want to quit, you will likely find your head is about to roll. I had a close call with this once. Then I learned that the company doesn't really want people to be honest and candid, that's it's just one of the traps they put in their policies.