>If I have clinical depression, saying "you're completely normal and do not have depression" doesn't make the depression go away or subside in any way.

This is really not a good analogy. An identity-linked issue like this would be closer to someone not being included into a certain in-group.

For example an African-American who grows up in a predominantly caucasian could be called "not black" or "not black enough" by someone trying to hurt them based on the way they speak or act differently.

You can imagine that this would be alleviated by people not putting up arbitrary rules on who "can be called black".