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Pro tip: one should not defend clearly sexist behavior if for no other reason than it associates you with sexist behavior in your own mind. And the speaker's behavior, as described, is clearly sexist.

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I wasn't defending Noah's behavior. I was defending Noah.

Your defense is wrapped up in the context of the entire conversation, which is specifically about a particular behavior. Claims that you're offended by the behavior and are only defending ther person, even if they are genuine, are superseded by the enclosing context. For better or worse.

as near as i could read, no one was attacking Noah -- just Noah's behavior, which seems out of line.

See the "i'm not calling you a racist, i'm calling your behavior racist" crucial line of distinction. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0Ti-gkJiXc)

Noah can be a sweet, helpful, lovable teddy bear, and still have behavior that needs to be called out.

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