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Which, while true, is about as helpful as answering "Yes." to the question "Do you know what time it is?".

Which is about as helpful an answer as you can get when you ask if a 'language' (haskell) solves the same problems as an 'API' (node)

No, it's about as unhelpful an answer as you can get. Why would you even bother?

Would you answer him the same way in person if he came to a Haskell meetup?

This is not really about the Haskell language, but rather the GHC compiler and runtime that implement the language.

What the GHC runtime does is somewhat comparable to what Node.js does.

This is a flawed argument, the problems that higher level languages solve are those of organisation and program structure.

By the same token, any problem that can be solved in javascript can also be solved in CSS3+HTML or brainfuck.

...time to get to work on that framework...

CSS3 + HTML isn't Turing complete