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With how many times it seems to stop to load, I'll go black-out drunk if I went for a beer every time the game offered me the opportunity.

I'm playing the 360 version and haven't loaded it to the internal disk. Maybe that will help the load times.

It definitely will; the demo load times weren't nearly as bad.

Microsoft should add a requirement that any loading screens that require an action to continue (DNF requires you to press "A" once loading is complete to start the game) make some kind of noise when they finish.

The load times are remarkably short on my machine. There is an almost imperceptible flicker at save checkpoints. Though it is kind of a monster.

DNF is exactly the game my teenage self was hoping for. As an adult, it's a little flat but I can't see it as heinously bad as many reviews are painting it.

Maybe it just seemed to get better as more and more braincells died?

I think that's the joke...