No one is forcing you to use Apple's messaging platform. You can pay for SMS instead, if you feel that's the "free" option.
No one is forcing you to upload your music to the iCloud. You can keep syncing it the same way you always have (afaict, anyway).
No one is forcing you to buy an iPhone, iPad, or any other Apple product. What kind of lock-in are you on about?
No one is even forcing you to upgrade to Lion. Keep running Snow Leopard if you want.
If you don't like it, don't buy it. There are plenty of other vendors. The only way in which you could claim that Apple was "locking people in" is that they offer an integrated experience, so that if you go all-Apple, things work better.
Well, damn them, they should be shot! How dare they try to offer an integrated user experience to their paying customers? What bastards!