Which have you tried? I had similar problems as you with steamlink, but geforce experience+moonlight has been a godsend. Works incredibly well (if you have a Nvidia GPU)
Steam has been the only thing I've tried LAN (other than some early PS4 remote play years ago), so that may be the issue. Geforce Now is probably the best I've tried of the bunch, so I'll give their tools a shot locally next time.