I feel the exact same way, and am the exact same age.
But we’re 29, not 49 or even 39. There’re still figs on the tree.
But we’re 29, not 49 or even 39. There’re still figs on the tree.
That said, time is ticking and while it isn't too late, now is the best time to start!
To be honest I've felt like this since I was 18 and it never went away. What made you realize this wasn't the case?
42 here, already two major career changes. And I am glad I made both changes.
Beautiful, this is the explanation I was looking for because whenever I'd hear that "it's never too late," I just felt like that enabled procrastination, but your explanation solidified that life is not long, but rather it is short indeed. It's true that it's not too late for many of your future opportunities, but eventually, time will run out.
They might think they do, but life never unfolds itself according to our plans.
Never compare to others. You don't know what they're going through, or what they're going to go through.
It took me until my mid 30s to realize just how impossible the idea of "having life figured out" really is.
There are other cultural and societal factors at play, but the greater longevity and better medical care have opened up the time period for the expectations that previous generations had for their 20s.
There may be future interventions that correct for that, but generally, quality of ova starts declining after 30 and much more so after 35.
Not to mention the energy to keep up with little ones, and if you ever want the option of more than 2 kids. And of course if you’re 30+ when you have kids, and your kids are 30+ when they have kids, you are pushing 65 to 70+ which makes playing with the grandkids not as much fun and you’re soon to be less of an asset in terms of help and possibly a liability for your kids due to declining health.
On the other hand, you may have increased your chances at having a higher paying career, but I suspect, for many, the extra savings don’t quite make up for the trade offs.
I had mine in 30 to 35 range, but if I could go back in time and had found my spouse, I think I would have opted to have them in 25 to 30 range. However, no one in my social circles has kids in their 20s and barely anyone is married by 30 so we also may have been socially isolated if we had chosen to do that.
But I try to think back to what I did in my 25 to 30 range that I thought was worth delaying starting a family and I can’t come up with anything, other than being a little bit further ahead in the rat race. But all the other rats are thinking the same thing, so who is really benefiting?
It also seems useful to become a parent with that extra decade of life experience. And if we incentivize exercise in the later years, it could offset the "feeling tired at 70" thing? My fiancé's grandpa runs marathons and honestly has more energy than I do!
The bottleneck is the same as it is for any issue regarding children.
The prospective mother must be willing.
I also don’t think you’re thinking about things too soon. We’re all slightly different. Also don’t make decisions for other people by writing them off. Just because they present one way doesn’t make that the sum total of who they are. You’ll need to have relationships in order to meet someone to have kids with.