> . . . like going to a restaurant, getting massive food poisoning, almost dying, ending up with a $150,000 hospital bill and then the restaurant emails you with "Dear valued customer, we're sorry for the inconvenience and have decided to award you a $50 gift card for any of our restaurants, thanks!".

It's even slightly worse than that. SLAs generally refund you for the prorated portion of your monthly fee the service was out, so it's more like "here's a gift card for the exact value of the single dish we've determined caused your food poisoning." Hehe.