Did you have a hard time convincing your wife to do sleep training on your kid? My wife thinks it’s abusive. I think it’s abusive to everyone else in the house not to do it!
As some stranger on the internet said:
"After I had my first kid, I thought I was God's gift to parenting. A few years later I had a second kid and he cured me of such misconceived notions." :-D
My wife asked him how he raised such helpful kids and he said: bribery. If they behaved well and helped with things they would be getting a video game of their choice.
That night it took my daughter less than 15 minutes to stop screaming, and then everyone in the house slept for 6 hours straight.
In less than a week she was smiling when we put her down for the night.
I hope it works out that well for you.
I gave in and still put our 4 and 6 year olds to sleep in our big family bed, then teleport them later. After being a bit annoyed in the beginning, I've changed my mind by now. Bringing them to bed is honestly the best thing ever.
Babies are not copies, they react in various ways.