I was suicidally depressed in 2017. A combination of medication, CBT, talk therapy and the love and care of other helping professionals got me better. I've never felt better. It gets better. My email is in my user info.
I wasn't suicidal in 2017, but every day felt like a literal nightmare, I hated living, every day was pain, and I didn't care if I lived or died. Today I'm happy and healthy. You can get out. Email is also in profile.
It's a weird place to be. Nothing matters. I got past the pain into a peaceful place. The state of California kept sending me a tax bill for $4,000 that I threw away. Eventually they seized my bank account and with penalties took out $12,000. My reaction was that it was interesting that they did that. It felt like I was watching someone else's life, maybe someone on TV.
Im no Psychiatrist but your description sounds like derealization which amongst other things is a symptom of depression. I would recommend consulting your doctor about this.
Thanks I did and recovered nicely from it through therapy and medication
FYI: Your email isn’t visible to other users (except moderators) right now—it has to be in the About field to be visible to everyone else.
Thanks. Fixed it.
And when you've been severely depressed and get better, I argue you feel better than anybody who has never suffered with it.
That's true for me. Everyday feels like a blessing.