Why rail against people using convenience and amenity as if it's some kind of character flaw?...
If part of your identity is your workplace, perhaps that's fine? That can be hard for people to understand when they don't integrate their work into their identity though, and that could be the distaste.
And I agree with the spirit of your post, I believe. I think it's important for people to find their own methods for establishing an identity, but more importantly to teach everyone to recognize and respect alternative methods without trying to rail against them as you say.
I love having a good cafeteria for breakfast and lunch. Going out to eat is such a massive time sink and you really should eat with your coworkers where possible. On-site gyms are the same, if I'm already going to the gym after work, why make a special trip?
It doesn't mean that you're stuck at work the entire time. In fact, I'd argue that it can reduce your time at the office, if used right. Use your breaks to run some errands that you'd normally do after work. Schedule your workout for 3:00-4:00 if you have a meeting that runs a little later. Etc.
You can be a fully functioning adult and still enjoy those benefits.
also, quite frankly as someone who has had a life that spans restaurant cooking and FANNG employment, that food will never be as good for you as food you make for yourself/ someone makes for you at hom.
It has not really enhanced any aspect of my character. If anything I tend to get paper plates more often because I don't want to do the dishes sometimes.
I'd also argue that the only nefarious benefit is possibly keeping you stuck in the office. The employee being happy, healthy and with more time on their hands is a benefit to both the employee and company, and a much larger boon to the employee.
Guess what – I was also free to go run an errand in the middle of the day, leave at 5 to go to a fitness class and come back for dinner, or just leave whenever and not come back. Many days I'd work from home until 11:30 or so, and then go in for lunch. Some days I'd work from home entirely.
You can call me an infantile corporate slave all you want, but I knew what was going from day one (that the food policies are designed in the company's self-interest was obvious and not, to me, repugnant) and perfectly capable of taking care of myself when I need to, thank you very much.
Since I left that job, I've cooked for myself and my partner quite regularly. Shopping, cooking, cleaning, etc is an incredible time suck, and most of it much less fun than the extra 2 hours I spent at the office (half that eating, and the other half maybe working or maybe not). It does feel nice to be in control of my life this way, but if I were to go back to employment I'd absolutely desire the perks I had at the previous job.
as though these "responsibilities" are worthy of spending time. If it was possible, eating out and not having to chores (of washing dishes etc) is a good luxury.
> they give you that so you never leave work?
yes, this is why, but if you understand what the trade off is, and decide that it's better, then it's not miserable. And if you also happen to enjoy the work, it's a win-win.
Sounds to me that people who does not enjoy such benefits are just getting sour grapes.