Comment by umwbk9gagy | Hacker News Reader

Comment by umwbk9gagy | Hacker News Reader

Parent Full thread

I think if I were female, I'd be a more successful founder. As a white male, I found that no investors were even willing to talk to me in spite of being an early employee at some great startups including Airbnb. I applied (and interviewed) at YC multiple times and was rejected for mostly BS reasons, which I think were just a cover for "we don't like you". I get it, I'm not a likable person, it's something I have to live with every day and I hate it about myself (also I'm mildly autistic, which doesn't help).

I've given up on the startup thing because I lack the necessary connections to get ahead. Without funding, I can't market properly, and I can't hire sales people. It doesn't matter how great the product is, because at the end of the day it's all about sales and marketing.

There's a significant number of VCs and funds which only invest in female founders, which is a huge advantage. The bar is much lower, which is great if you're a woman. It's just like hiring programmers: 2 sets of standards, one for men and one for women. For better or worse, that's the way it is.

I'm sure many of us can empathize with your struggles, but starting a gender flamewar is not a valid way to express them on Hacker News, so please don't do that.

https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html

> There's a significant number of VCs and funds which only invest in female founders, which is a huge advantage.

I understand your reasoning in saying this, but please try to understand that being taken seriously as a female founder is much more difficult being taken seriously as a male.

These VCs exist to combat this preexisting inequality.

Is the inequality between men and women, or between people on the inside who incidentally are mostly men, and people on the outside who are also mostly men but include a relatively higher fraction of women?

Being a "likable person" is, for better or worse, pretty significant in sales / pitching / persuasion of any kind. If you really feel you lack this and have limited ability to improve, then a partner who fills this gap would be indispensable for your endeavors.

Yep, that's why I gave up.

Sounds like your gender is not a problem, since you concede that an investment in your venture would likely be wasted

It may be that this path is not for you so you've probably done the right thing. The market isn't fair and it's up to you to exploit your advantages (unfair or fair) and overcome your disadvantages (unfair or fair). If you find that infeasible, you can't play the game.

Indeed, so I guess I'll get a job or maybe just suicide because what's the point. I don't really feel like working hard so someone else can get rich off my labour anymore.

I'm not a clinician, but you replied to my comment so I feel obligated to say this: go see a mental health professional.

You sound clinically depressed. I don't think being a man is why you failed. There is nothing wrong with working a job and slowly building wealth, especially someone who is supposedly a highly skilled software engineer - you can make retirement money in not-so-many years if you live frugally and save wisely. I seriously think you need some professional counseling.

But of course if a female CEO works the system and exploits it the way men does she is highlighted online for lacking morals and ethics even though plenty of men run businesses the same way all the time and are either not even noticed for doing it or otherwise glorified.

People online are insignificant. Online Peter Thiel is some sort of vampire who feeds off the lifeblood of young men and governments while suppressing the press. In real life, Peter Thiel is a respected businessman who is considered one of the archetypes of a successful entrepreneur.

In the story, there are parts she openly regrets as having optimized for appearance: returning to work so soon after having given birth. There are parts she doesn't express regret over but mentions (the miscarriage, pumping in the car instead of a mother's room and the ensuing feelings of humiliation).

There's probably a balance here but it appears that optimizing for appearance isn't of much value except when you need people to believe in your appearance: meeting investors, talking to your team. Since most people online are neither, they are not important.

Do you have any data at all to show that the bar is much lower? Can you please provide it.

Reply on news.ycombinator.com