You are mixing tidal forces with local attraction forces due to ice. Even though the forces due to ice are not felt everywhere in the planet, they do have an effect that can be calculated, and it is stronger in the body of water closer to the poles. The result of this force causes water attraction in the polar regions. So the effect that is felt in other parts of the planet is not due to the gravity force, but due to the displacement of water happening in polar regions - after all the water needs to go somewhere.