Comment by thrav | Hacker News Reader

Comment by thrav | Hacker News Reader

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I find it amusing how often attractive women get two words that sound similar, mixed up. Things like, “for all intensive purposes” or others — I think you know what I mean.

My hypothesis is that no one wants to correct them, the way they would someone they don’t fear retribution from. Their friends might fear being ostracized for implying they’re stupid. Their suitors might fear pushing them away for the same reason. They just say it wrong for years while everyone nods and smiles.

I’ve made a habit of noting them in meetings and then privately informing them after. Have heard replies like, “Wait, really!? That’s so embarrassing, I’ve been saying that wrong for YEARS.”

Constantly getting a pass cuts both ways. It’s also harder to stand on their own, since they grow so accustomed to people constantly offering help, and free stuff.

> how often attractive women get two words that sound similar, mixed up.

> I’ve made a habit of noting them in meetings and then privately informing them after.

You have an unhealthy bias and condescension is not a solution.

I don’t just do it for women, I just made a comment about how it feels more frequent with attractive women, shared my observation, and attempted to explain why I think that might be the case. There is a difference.

I don’t believe it’s condescending to recognize a error, and offer assistance. We all make mistakes. It’s literally the first thing I ask every new manager to do for me if they observe something less than ideal in an interaction.

Well pointed and a great example how society cannot be unbiased. We all have our own biases and might not even want to even acknowledge them because that jab at who we are.

Why are you pulling women aside after meetings to tell them how to speak properly? Just leave them be

Pulling women aside to correct them is mildly sexist and patronizing, but pulling people aside to correct them privately is generally a polite thing to do.

I'm picturing a notepad with the names of the attractive women in your office and a tally for each kind of gaffe next to their name with a subnote describing the gaffe.

It's not a very flattering picture.

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