Edit: You are posting under your name since you have disclosed it in your HN bio. If you are not pleased that people use it when replying to you then perhaps you realise that your comments do not reflect that well on you.
https://hn.algolia.com/?dateRange=all&page=0&prefix=false&qu...
If he does not like it then perhaps he should not publish his name on HN or should write things that he is not ashamed of.
If you introduce yourself by "Hi I'm John" then you cannot complain that people call you John.
This is ridiculous.
If their name was not available on HN I would agree with you, but, again, in this case the person voluntarily introduced themselves on HN first.
I also note that the person in question still has their name in their HN's "about" so clearly they have no problem with it.
Btw, my intent is that I don't like hypocrisy and posturing. It's hypocrisy to claim to feel offended and intimidated by me addressing that person by their name, which their freely published in their HN's "about", and you seem to be playing along.
I'll move on now...
We can't make a simple rule about this. Imagine someone posting "Oh my god, Joe Schmoe! We worked together at Acme Inc!" or whatever. That's harmless. But yeah, if you're in an argument with someone - don't go there. In that case it most likely signals personal aggression.
I appreciate that you don't like hypocrisy and posturing. I don't either. But there can easily be distortion in our interpretation of such things online. We have so few data points on each other that whatever picture we receive is mostly how our own imagination has connected the dots; and we tend to fill in the blank spaces with material from our own darker side. The net result is that we end up feeling surrounded by our own demons on the internet - I've written about this in the past: https://hn.algolia.com/?dateRange=all&page=0&prefix=false&qu.... That clearly doesn't take us to good places, so we need to guard against it.