The outgoing HHKB Pro2 might interest you if it's within your budget. It's hard to find now as it's been replaced by the HHKB Pro Classic with no USB hub.
Also pretty ridiculous that the two USB ports are mini USB.
I don't really have a budget if I could find the right keyboard, but after searching extensively there is none that checks all the boxes. Either I need to give up the USB ports, go with full size or go with lower quality (Das Keyboard).
I thank you nonetheless for the suggestion!