So Twilio's SDK counts, but Jitsi's doesn't because ...? You can build custom interfaces with all your requested features with that too.
I spent some time looking at the Jitsi Meet source to confirm this assertion:
https://github.com/jitsi/jitsi-meet/
It was quite clear that trying to use that code to execute my use case above would have been a very large waste of time, and quite possibly (given the lack of docs) a futile exercise.
These are the React features supported, including chat/conference,etc https://github.com/jitsi/jitsi-meet/tree/master/react/featur...
https://github.com/jitsi/lib-jitsi-meet/blob/master/doc/API....
Hats off to anyone who can rapidly go from those docs to a deployed and working app. I was able to modify the repo linked in the parent to suit my needs in roughly 2-3 hours, much of which was install/setup.