I start to get into a motivational rut if all I'm doing is working on a list of technical things to complete. Engineering disciplines are some of the few degrees that provide you the ability to both directly solve other people's problems and have close customer contact - that was a major reason why software engineering attracted me as a career rather than just a hobby.
For junior and even mid-level engineers, your performance is generally evaluated on checklists of mundane shit. Code is passably neat and organized? Check. Code has and passes tests? Check. Feature checks requirements boxes? Check, check, check.
Especially at larger organizations, I've found that the dev role is very much of an "implementer", that your job is to take the design, spec, architecture and put it into place as close to the above as possible.
You're much less likely to be actually sorting out the why/how of the system.
Douglas Adams made his career reiterating the cliche engineers do not communicate with the customer.
I do have a technical degree. But I think my underlying problem is because of how I was brought up. I had strict parents and family members and was always told what to do. Questioning things was not something I was taught and I grew up to always follow the "rules".
And I think that has (kind of) led to my current state where without rules I struggle to make decisions.
>And I think that has (kind of) led to my current state where without rules I struggle to make decisions.
I worry that the newer generations brought up in zero tolerance environments will come late to questioning authority, if ever. Life is far more nuanced and negotiable than school and zero tolerance leads people to believe and folks like yourself who aren't equipped to think creatively in these situations have been robbed of a valuable skill.
[Edit] - people skills. One ex-military guy who was recruited into my team was asked by corporate HR how he would deal with 'difficult conversations'. His answer had to do with telling people / families that their best friends / relatives (soldiers under his command) had been killed in action, or persuading one of his squaddies not to marry the local prostitute. When I decided to step back from team leadership he was my first choice as my replacement, and later became one of the best bosses I've ever had.
Very cool example you have there. I'm keeping this filed on my Roam Research documents!
I’ll push back a lot and I’ve seen other much more senior technical people that will do the same. A lot of people just want to come to work, heads down coding, and then leave.
Sounds like there is more of a problem with how the army is asking verse what they expect. If they were more direct in what they wanted vs measuring some scenerio they created.
It isn't clear to me whether you think this is good or bad.
In short rigidity on the part of individuals combined with countervailing organizational goals to combatting same is the issue.