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It sounds like a cult !

That sounds unaligned. Please report to the Alignment Center at your earliest convenience. Escorts will be available for your use in 20 seconds.

This may not sound the way you intended.

I’ve tried to read that for a solid few minutes and still can’t see what else could have been intended.

"Escorts" is a term for high-end sex workers.

"Escorts" is a term for someone who guides you somewhere.

Alignment: Chaotic Good!

Those places are fun to work in, especially if you have already found another job and you are counting the days before you walk out the door.