Tech selects for people who are object focussed as opposed to people focussed.
Most women prefer to date men who are good at wooing and entertaining them. Which means more people focussed than object focussed.
The tech men are frustrated because they are basically their best selves -- financially and professionally successful, able and willing to support a family. Traditionally that would be enough to make them a catch.
But dating women with careers limits the value of their financial support. And they don't have the skills to wow the women socially.
Realistically they can't develop those skills easily.
This is probably going to sound incredibly cynical, but the best advice I've heard for NYC techies is to try to date ballerinas.
They're beautiful and disciplined. But they retire before 30 and have to decide to either start a family or open a studio to start teaching. At that point most of the men they know are married or gay.
So likely to be more willing to overlook the social weaknesses of tech men.