My son started kindergarten this year, and unfortunately we are zoned into one of the worst schools in the district. He’s a bright kid, already knows everything they would teach him, so we weren’t concerned about academics, but let me tell you—his behavior at home, and especially his language use, has taken a really troubling turn. He is obviously picking up the behavior of some of the children he goes to school with.

I read a book not too long ago entitled “The Nurture Assumption,” by Judith Harris. It influenced me more than anything I’ve read as a parent, because it is so obviously true. Her thesis is that everyone assumes that adults have a significant impact on a child’s future, yet there is basically zero evidence to support such an assumption.

Peer groups are the dominant influence on a child’s personality and development, full stop. This is probably hard for educators to accept because there’s really nothing that can be done about it from their perspective.