I remember getting a £30 ZTE phone on 3 that did texts, calls, and had a fairly rubbish but workable browser. It wasn't complicated, it was small, light, and the battery lasted forever. It was a bit slow but for £30 it's a far better bargain than this John's Phone.

I even made a handy contacts parser for it: https://github.com/radiosilence/ZTEcontactsparse