Back in high school when myself and fellow cross-country running buddies were full of piss and vinegar, we decided one morning to jump in a high school friend's pond (with permission of course). The trick was that the water was
just cold enough to have really thin veneer of ice on top. Down to our shorts, and in we go. TFA says "your body goes into shock". I guess that's the best, albeit inadequate, way to describe it. It was like my heart stopped, and whatever makes my lungs work didn't work anymore. Gave it a second, and things kicked back in...sort of. I simply cannot imagine expending anymore effort than simple survival, let alone actually swim somewhere. I mean, how you gonna swim when you can't fucking
move? After a minute, we got out and our friend had towels waiting.
Lessons learned:
1. That goes on my list of things "no matter how good it sounds, no matter how much peer pressure, do not EVER do that again."
2. You fall off the Titanic into the North Atlantic, you ain't gonna last long no matter what the movies tell you. Based on my one, brief experience, I wonder if I wouldn't just quickly give up and get it over with. At least death stands a chance of not being indescribably cold.
3. The guy in TFA is 100% USDA Certified Bad Ass in my book. I've been in water only slightly warmer. I literally cannot imagine attempting such a thing. It's like pulling half your spark plugs, watering down the gas, then saying, "now, go drive across town. If you break down, elephant seals will eat you."