until one night I fell asleep on the couch in front of the TV, and it occurred to me that I could just modify this behaviour to bed.
So I put a handful of old Star Trek episodes on my phone. Each night I put me earphones on (so as not to disturb my wife), turn on an episode of Star Trek, and I am asleep within the first five minutes. ... I can even repeat episodes... it doesnt even matter since Im asleep within literally 5mins.
At first the earphones were annoying, but after a week you dont even notice them.
The stress at work continues, but I sleep like a baby.
I think the familiarity of Star Trek (which I watched a lot as a kid) gives me a subconsious sense of security.